Gentle Reader, I love horror films. Beginning at a tender age, I have been an equal-opportunity horror fan: I love the slashers, wonderful Tartan Asian Extreme, the psychological thrillers, the Italian giallo films, the zombies, the spooks, the splatters, the revenge films, the moments of dread in mainstream films that make them horrific. All of it. I love all of it. This is a list, in no order, of five beloved crazies from some of my favorite slashers. Click on the picture for a clip. CAUTION: Here there be spoilers!
The Caller from Black Christmas
I have had some experiences with obscene phone callers, and those guys were amateurs compared to this gem. Seriously. The calls were the scariest, most memorable scenes for this viewer. This is not to say that the death scenes were not well done; they were. The caller is just so...crazy. He turns on a dime from run-of-the-mill pervert to dangerous very authentically. Freak.
Crazy Ralph from Friday the 13th
Dear Ralph. I am sorry for what happened to you, more sorry than I am for the scores of
counselors claimed by the Vorhees family and their successors. You really tried to warn them. If only your communication skills were better.
Chop Top from Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part II
I think Part II is a great film for precisely the opposite reasons Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974) is a great film. I will cover the glory of Part I in another post; it’s Part II’s time to shine here, and no part of this film shines brighter than Leatherface’s older brother, Chop Top. Chop Top was absent for the events that took place in part I because he was busy having part of his head destroyed in Vietnam. From what I gather, it was the sane part. Now, don’t get me wrong, the whole Sawyer clan is pretty off. Hitchhiker was less than altogether, and their father is clearly not well. Leatherface is the sensitive Holden Caulfield of the film, clearly in need of psychological intervention, but you can tell he has a soft, gooey center. None of the family are as completely, gleefully unhinged as Chop Top. He’s the whole package: Sonny Bono wig-wearing, scalp-burning-with-a-hot-wire-hanger-ing, screeching pile of crazy. Brilliant.
Marie from Haute Tension
Ah, Marie. You’re such a good friend to come to the rescue of lovely Alex from that vile, murderous drifter. Wait a second.
Aunt Martha from Sleepaway Camp
I think of all of these characters, Aunt Martha is my favorite. That voice. Those clothes. I mean, come on. I listed a few murderous monsters above and one crazy messenger, but Aunt Martha is the only one from the list who created a monster. I could watch her brief scenes again and again.
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